by Jeff Guthrie

Disclaimer: this article is not intended to offer medical advice. Always consult your physician if you believe your child is sick.

You’ve been asleep for two hours when blood-curdling screams launch you from your bed. You have no idea what is wrong but you’re positive that it’s a life or death situation. You run at world-record speed into your child’s room, grab them up and start checking the room for intruders or monsters. Your adrenaline is pumping and your fight-or-flight response is in full gear. After what seems like hours (but is actually only about 60 seconds), you notice that there are no immediate threats in the room but the baby is still crying and you start wondering if you need to rush to the hospital.

This is but one example of the many times that children cry for no apparent reason. All parents have experienced or will experience that terrifying moment when your child is screaming or crying and just will not stop. It might happen at night or during the day, at home or at the mall. The worst part is that parents don’t have control of the situation and generally don’t know what to do. Most parents’ immediate response is to run for the nearest medical professional and demand answers. A trip to the ER is usually not necessary and the following segments are designed to help you determine if your baby needs attention and, specifically, what kind of attention.

Part One – Basic Rules

There are no hard and fast rules for when you should take your baby or toddler to the doctor. When children are still so young that they cannot communicate, it is up to Mom and Dad to decide. It is very normal for parents to want to take their children to the doctor at the first signs of trouble, but it is not always necessary and there are some things to consider before heading off to the emergency room.

In our house we try to follow some basic rules:

Rule #1:

Never lose your temper with the baby or with your spouse. If you are that stressed, take it outside. Put the baby in a safe place (crib or playpen) and go outside and count to ten (or a hundred).

Rule #2:

If Mommy’s intuition (deep down feeling, not just the initial thought) says we should take the baby to the doctor, we do.

Rule #3:

Always check the baby’s diaper and clothing to make sure he is not being pinched or squeezed (I have actually stripped my son naked during a bout of blood-curdling screams to have him lay his head gently on my shoulder and fall fast asleep).

Rule #4:

Always remember that your baby is a smaller version of you and your spouse so consider the environment and decide if the baby needs Mommy and Daddy attention instead of medical attention. Sometimes, if parents argue or are just not paying attention, children will throw a tantrum to get attention.

Part Two – Check Everything and Try Everything

After following the basic rules, we consider some of the items below before going to the doctor:

When the baby is crying or upset:

• Check for a temperature, a rash, a bug bite or any other outward sign that something is physically wrong. A temperature usually indicates that the body is fighting whatever is wrong. If the baby has a low-grade fever, consult with your doctor’s office before rushing off to the emergency room. They may tell you to give the baby a fever reducer and monitor the child before going to the hospital.

• Ask yourself if there is something the baby wants
  • Food – has the baby eaten lately?
  • Drink – has the baby had anything to drink lately?
  • Clothes – is the baby warm or cold or are clothes or diaper too tight?
  • Shoes – is the baby wearing shoes that are too tight?
  • Sleep – did the baby not sleep well or at all last night or get up earlier than usual?

Hint: If you have recently taken something away from the child or told him he cannot have something, try giving him whatever it was he wanted or that was taken away. The child may have just realized that he is not getting what he wanted.

• Try the baby favorites (these are the tried-and-true things that always make your baby laugh)
  • Video – put on the baby’s favorite video
  • Food – give the baby ice cream or whatever else is a favorite
  • Toy – find and give them a favorite toy.
  • Game – try to involve the baby in a favorite game
  • Clothes – give the baby his favorite clothes or rain galoshes
  • Music – play a favorite song
  • Book – read a favorite book

Hint: All children like different things. One great solution is to try and have something in reserve that is almost guaranteed to make your baby happy, whether it is a Milky Way bar or some little toy. The object is not to spoil the child, just use the reserve in the most extreme situations.

• Try something new and silly – sometimes all it takes is something new and different to make your child forget what he was upset about
  • Try making faces or noises
  • Try new music
  • Try getting out clean clothes and having a pile-up
  • Try singing
  • Try tickling the tummy with Dad’s electric razor
  • Try just about anything

Hint: Try a night-light. I actually had a coworker give me a hug the day after I suggested he and his wife try putting a night-light in their crying baby’s room. Apparently, they had not slept for about six nights in a row because the baby kept waking up screaming.

• Try a change of environment
  • Take the baby outside
  • Take the baby for a ride
  • Put the baby in the car seat, put it on the dryer and turn the dryer on.
  • Call your neighbor and ask if you can come over
  • Call one of your child’s playmates who lives nearby and go visit
  • Call Grandma and Grandpa and go visit them
  • Take the baby for a walk

Part Three – Consult a doctor

Just keep in mind that babies and toddlers are little people and they feel the same feelings that Mommy and Daddy do. As your baby gets older, you will be better equipped to read his moods and know when he is just starved for attention. Just remember that if he could tell you what was wrong, he would.

After you have exhausted all of your efforts, it’s time to start considering a visit to the doctor. Throughout this entire process you should be closely watching your child to see if his behavior indicates what might be wrong. If your child does not respond to normal stimuli that he generally finds amusing and he is just not acting like he usually does, call the doctor’s office and see what they advise. Generally, pediatricians are very understanding when it comes to young children and will gladly see you as often as you like. However, they will also appreciate it when you make an extra effort to discover if your child really needs to see the doctor. Good luck!